I Have Returned

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I Have Returned
Studio album by
ReleasedSeptember 1985
GenreCountry, novelty
ProducerRay Stevens
Ray Stevens chronology
Ray Stevens Collector's Series
I Have Returned
Surely You Joust

I Have Returned was Ray Stevens' twenty-second studio album and his second for MCA Records, released in 1985. The pictures on both the front and the back of the album were taken in the Mississippi Sound near Biloxi, Mississippi according to the album credits. The cover depicts Stevens dressed as General Douglas MacArthur from World War II. "The Haircut Song" and "The Ballad of the Blue Cyclone" were released as singles from the album. "Santa Claus Is Watching You" is a re-recording of Stevens' 1960s pop single and was re-issued as a country single around the time of the album's release and was made into a popular music video.

Stevens later re-recorded "The Pirate Song" on his 1991 album #1 With a Bullet and re-recorded the song a third time in 2000 for a music video found on Funniest Video Characters.

The first track, "Thus Cacked Henrietta", is a rendition of the popular fanfare portion from Richard Strauss' "Also sprach Zarathustra", performed in chicken clucks. The rendition by Stevens lasts a little over 1 minute and was his first chicken-clucking performance since 1977's "In the Mood," released under the alias The Henhouse Five Plus Too.

Track listing[edit]

Side 1
1."Thus Cacked Henrietta" (a/k/a Also sprach Zarathustra)Richard Strauss (arr. Ray Stevens)1:20
2."Hugo (The Human Cannonball)"Stevens, C.W. Kalb Jr., Carlene Kalb3:47
3."Vacation Bible School"Kalb Jr., Kalb3:28
4."Armchair Quarterback"Bobby Russell3:30
5."The Ballad of the Blue Cyclone, Part 1"Glenn Sutton, Larry Cheshier3:44
6."The Ballad of the Blue Cyclone, Part 2"Sutton, Cheshier4:25
Side 2
1."Kiss a Pig"Kalb Jr., Kalb3:05
2."The Haircut Song"Mike Neun, Stevens, Kalb Jr.6:11
3."The Pirate Song (I Want to Sing and Dance)"Kalb Jr., Kalb4:43
4."Punk Country Love"Stevens, Kalb Jr., Kalb3:36
5."Santa Claus Is Watching You"Stevens3:21

Album credits[edit]

  • Arranged & Produced by: Ray Stevens
  • Engineer: Stuart Keathley
  • Recorded at: Ray Stevens Studio, Nashville, Tennessee
  • Mastered by: Glenn Meadows at Masterfonics


  • Keyboards & Synthesizers: Ray Stevens
  • Drums: Jerry Carrigan & Jerry Kroon
  • Bass: Jack Williams
  • Electric Guitars: Steve Gibson
  • Rhythm Guitars: Mark Casstevens
  • Banjo: Mark Casstevens
  • Dobro: Steve Gibson
  • Saxophone: Denis Solee
  • Trombone: Roger Bissell
  • Trumpet: Ray Stevens
  • Tympani: Ray Stevens
  • Background Vocals: Lisa Silver, Diane Tidwell, Wendy Suits, Ray Stevens
  • Art Direction: Ray Stevens & Slick Lawson
  • Design: Simon Levy
  • Photography: Slick Lawson
  • Production: Susan Scott
  • Landing Craft: Vincent J. Fusca, III, Captain USMC, 4th PLT (REIN) CO. A, 4th ASLT AMPH BN, USMCR, Gulfport, MS
  • Special Thanks To: Pony Maples-Weapons, Faye Sloan Costumes, George Nalley-Stevens Aviation

Chart performance[edit]


Chart (1985) Peak
U.S. Billboard Top Country Albums 1


Year Single Peak positions
US Country
1985 "The Haircut Song" 45
1986 "The Ballad of the Blue Cyclone" 50